Borgman, Dean. "Understanding Sex and Sexuality," S. Hamilton, MA: Center for Youth Studies.

 

 

OVERVIEW

 

 

It's important to discuss sex with youth in every area of our culture and lives:

Ø      in sex symbols

Ø      in Nelson Mandella and Mother Theresa

Ø      in Jesus

Ø      in babies and parents

Ø      among married friends

Ø      between teachers and students

Ø      in creative artists

Ø      in preachers

Ø      in the Song of Solomon

 

 

In addition, we need to developing a Theology of Sex. God has given two great gifts to human beings -  our Twin Drives:

 

          UNION                                                       DOMINION

(communion, communication, community) (power, achievement, progress)

 

sucking                  (two basic human instincts)        grasping

submission/reception                                              assertiveness, aggression

nurture                                                                  discipline

loving                                                                    partnering

 

 

When we talk about sex, we’re discussing our basic need for another plus erotic and genital drives. It includes everything from fantasies to noticing, gaining attention of, romantic talk, touching, fondling and arousing, to climax whether in coitus or alternatives to coitus including mutual masturbation.

 

What our study has indicated, however, is that sex is part of a greater creative energy that serves in all relationships, friendships, artistic endeavors, communication… and points to our ultimate drive toward and restlessness for union with God.

Understanding this enables us to understand healthy expressions of our sexuality in all kinds of creativity and communion as it was expressed in Jesus.

 

It is important for single persons to understand and practice healthy and creative outlets for sexual energy. Married persons also must understand healthy ways of relating to those of the opposite sex other than their spouses. Sexual energy cannot be stamped out, stuffed down or repressed. We can’t “bottle it up” without it leaking in one way or another.

 

The answer lies in lifting this energy up from the genital level and expressing it in healthy relationships and positive, creative endeavors.

 

 

The subtle tendency to let the positive energy in friendships or contacts with the opposite sex slip down to the erotic or genital level is always present. The Bible describes this as the lust of the flesh. Many biblical characters were severely tempted; King David fell to this temptation. Some of us will struggle with this temptation more than others. We must all be aware since there is so much at stake.

 

 

 

IMPLICATIONS

 

Paul’s principle at the end of Romans 12 (v. 21) provides us with powerful and practical instruction in this matter. “Don’t be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.”

 

 

It is now up to us to apply this to our own lives, challenge all volunteer leaders in this regard, and finally to apply what has been here written for adults into the culture and language of the youth we serve.