To discuss ways in which one is influenced by peers and how these influences affect one’s life.

OVERVIEW

LEADER PREPARATION

• Research positive and negative peer influence situations.
• Prepare examples of peer pressure situations:
• Positive. How peers have joined forces to do good works or combat a bad situation.

Negative. How peer pressure has harmed a group or individual. Obtain some media samples (from television or music) that address peer influence. Obtain one blindfold and one index card for every member of the group (see Group Building).

GROUP BUILDING

Give everyone a card with the name of an animal on it. Make sure that there are two people in the group for every animal. Blindfold everyone and make them spread across the room. Tell them to make the sound of their animal until they find the other person who is making the same sound.

GROUP PRESENTATION

Play one or two songs that reflect how friends treat each other. (Examples: Michael W. Smith’s, "Friends"; James Taylor’s, "You’ve Got a Friend".) The songs should be appropriate to the group’s interests.

Discuss how friends sometimes let each other down, use each other, and manipulate each other. Often, these people are not really friends. Yet, there are also people who will be there. Discuss what it means to be a friend and why this is important in a discussion about peer influence.

Divide the group into three smaller groups. Give each group a description of a situation to act out in front of the group. Give them five minutes to prepare. Consider these situations:

• • A new student at school is befriended by a couple of nerdy kids. What does he do when the popular kids ask him to hang out with them? Does he ditch the kids that first welcomed him to the school? Can he be friends with the nerds and still hang out with the popular group?
  • Susie discovers that the guy Mary is dating has a reputation for taking advantage of girls and dumping them. She knows she must confront Mary, but Mary thinks this guy is wonderful. What should she do? How can she convince Mary that this guy is using her? What if this situation jeopardizes their friendship?
  • You are new in town and have been invited to a party. Everyone is drinking beer and other alcoholic beverages. Your parents will strongly punish you if they smell alcohol on your breath after the party. What do you do?

GROUP DISCUSSION

Ask any of these questions. Modify the list to the needs of your group:

• How do your peers influence you?
• Do you act differently around certain people? Explain.
• When you are with friends, are you "real," or are you hiding yourself?
• Do your views and opinions influence your friends? Why or why not?
• How are your beliefs and values respected by your peers?
• How do you negatively influence your friends?
• How do you positively influence your friends?
• Is it difficult to do something that opposes what your friends think that you should do? How do you handle those situations?

WRAP-UP

Summarize the main points of the discussion. Highlight several ways to understand and learn from peer influence:

• Question people and situations.
• Identify your peer group’s motivation.
• Are they helping or harming you?
• Perhaps friends are offering good advice: do you listen to them?
• Be alert. Think about what matters to you.

EVALUATION AND FOLLOW-UP

Find out what impact this session had on the participants. Did the young people walk away with any answers? Will they now be able to combat negative influence from peers? Can be more open to friends who are trying to help them? Do they believe that they can overcome peer pressure? Has this discussion provided them with any practical tools?

IMPLICATIONS

• Peer influence is an important topic of discussion; young people need to reflect on the people, things, ideas, and beliefs that are important in their lives.
• They need to compare what is important to them with what is important to their peer group.
• They need to understand if conflicts exist and if these conflicts are harmful.
• Parents, teachers, and youth leaders want to know about kids’ peer groups. This discussion will give adults insight into a young person’s world.

Paul Paris and Anne Montague cCYS