Bogert, C. (1997, January 20). The death of marriage? Life with mother. Newsweek (European edition), pp. 41-45.

OVERVIEW

More and more European women are having children out of wedlock, and no one seems to mind. Two questions are raised in this article. Is this the death of marriage? Does anyone in Europe believe in marriage anymore?

In Scandinavia, where the ritual of having children outside of marriage began in the 1960s, the generation that "started it all" is now having grandchildren. All across Europe, single motherhood is on the move. Many teenagers feel it is no longer a mistake to keep an unwanted pregnancy. For those beyond their teenage years, it is common for a single woman to decided to raise the child on her own. For most, they are mothers who live with the father for a while, but see no need in being married. Bodil Pedersen, a Copenhagen psychologist, has stated; " ‘Living together without being married is part of being Danish.’ "

Sweden leads the way, with more than fifty percent of children being born to unmarried women. France and England follow closely behind, with nearly one in three births to unmarried parents. Jeanne-Claude Kaufmann of the National Center for Scientific Research in Paris says, " ‘The place of marriage in French society has changed altogether. Thirty years ago it was the beginning of a relationship. Today it’s the culmination.’ "

"Wedding Bells Aren’t Ringing"

The Percentage of Live Births Outside Marriage, 1994 (Source: Eurostat)

In the United States, four out of five children in the ghetto are born to single mothers. The issue of the unmarried poor giving birth at a high rate is also seen in England and Ireland. Kathleen Kiernan of the London School of Economics says; " ‘Cohabiting families...are usually among the poorest [in society].’ " In Europe, many feel that the Catholic Church has lost much of its moral authority in today’s society. The rise of the women’s movement is also seen as a contributing factor. Many women live with the father but just don’t see the point of marrying him. Simply put, they are deciding that they don’t need men to survive.

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION AND DISCUSSION

1. How does this compare with the statistics in your country? How has this issue changed in the past thirty years?
2. What factors might exist in Greece, Switzerland, and Italy to explain their low percentage of live births outside marriage? What are the contributing factors for a high or low percentage in your country?
3. What factors contribute to the high single parent birth rate among the poor? What could be done to slow down this rate?
4. What ingredients have shaped the marriage views of today’s youth?

IMPLICATIONS

Teenagers today are growing up in a rapidly changing family system. They face a world with less traditional family role models and a society with fluctuating values. Only a careful analysis of the last thirty years can provide clues to addressing today’s problems among youth. Many feel that violence, vandalism, and an increase in crime are correlated to the breaking down of the traditional family system. There is a need for strong gender role models for children growing up in today’s culture. Youth workers need to be aware of the rapidly changing family system and attempt to support to teenagers in need, and also commit to strengthening the existing moral climate.